A man and his wife were driving home one night when the guy driving noticed a cop behind him with the lights flashing to pull him over. He told his wife "You just sit there and keep your big mouth shut and talk my way out of this."
The cop came to the guy and asked "do you know how fast you were going."
Oh, Yes officer as soon as I seen you in my mirror I looked at the speedometer and I was doing the speed limit.
His wife replied "I told him to slow down he must've been going 100 or so officer."
The man says to his wife "I told you to keep your big mouth shut!"
Then the cop said "I also notice you're not wearing your seatbelt."
The man said "I can explain officer, When I saw you pulling me over I knew you'd want to see my licence so I took off my seatbelt so I could get it out of my pocket."
To that his wife laughed,"He's never worn a seatbelt in his life."
The guy yelled,"You stupid bitch! What the hell is wrong with you? Shut your fuckin' mouth!"
The cop asked the lady "Does he always talk to you like that?"
She replied "No officer, Only when he's Drunk!"